Monday, December 22, 2008

NUW Security

I stopped by the Y today to get some laps in the pool, and had a product idea that is (dare I say?) brilliant! I shall call it the N.U.W. Security System, and it will be a valuable tool in protecting your semi-valuables in an unlocked locker. The key to this system? Nasty UnderWear. Who would want to reach through soiled panties or manties to root around in someones pockets? Now, they don't have to be actual soiled skivvies; it amazing what a schmere of brown shoe polish will do. And the deluxe model? They come with some dark colored curly fibers all over them.

Honestly ask yourself: would YOU touch them to get what's past them if you didn't know who's they were? I think not.

So, as I previously alluded to, I swam this evening. It sucked, but I'm glad I did it. I need to do it more often, and in greater volume. (that's what she said) Rest time is over, though, and it's base time. I also need to hit the gym and do a lot of muscle training. Ah, the off season!

And, since it's Christmas time, I thought I'd give my lady readers a gift:

Stay warm and hydrated. And no, Marcy, cosmos out of sippy cups don't count for hydration. Look it up.

14 comments:

teacherwoman said...

that soiled undewear is just nasty! LOL.

Happy Holiday's David!

nwgdc said...

Marcy has been a bit MIA recently...but I do NOT want to be around when she reads about the sippy cup. Yikes!

Gotta Run said...

Very creative indeed! Shame that the Y has had theft issues. think it is all over now.

Another great post David. Crazy things going on in that mind of yours.

Wes said...

That would definitely stop me :-)

Nick said...

Great idea! I'm tired of worrying about my stuff in the locker while I'm swimming. I bet the NUW Security system would even keep my favorite locker reserved just for me when I'm not there! How do I order?

streak said...

NUW does work wonders on the general public, but does not work on siblings (unless Nasty is real).
Good to get back in the swing of things with a swim. Happy Holidays to whole fam!

Jess said...

Get a patent on that. Pronto.

J~Mom said...

Good thinking on the security!! ANd hellooooo tri guy!!!!!

Lily on the Road said...

EEEWWWWWWW,

David, Wishing you, Mendy and Ms. Sweetpea Grace a Very Merry Christmas, looking forward to seeing what you are all up to in the New Year!!

Best Wishes!!!

Marathoner in Training said...

That is almost as good as when someone goes to disneyland and rents a stroller and hangs a clear plastic bag from the handle with a diaper and some rootbeer inside the bag. Who would want to steal that stroller, and who would mistake it for theirs.

Kevin said...

Yeah, nothing says stay away like someones dirty drawers

Chris said...

Nice! ewww but at the same time brilliant. (although a lock seems a little easier) ;-)

Speaking of pools, I haven't been back in a while myself.. Not looking forward to the suckitude of it either.

Merry Christmas!

Marcy said...

Oh my gawd!!! That is just nas-tay! But definitely a good idea ;-) I think you forgot one bit though . . .you need to incorporate some foul smells along with it. Can you buy a can of butt juice?

Wha?! Comos and sippys are the only way to roll!

kelly said...

Early Christmas plan! Nice one, I love your blog ! :)
Keep it up! ~ chaco ~